Although knitting may be calming, meditative, etc., it is still at heart a sedentary pursuit.  Sure, you can knit standing up; in the car (as a PASSENGER!); on a boat; on a plane; on a train (yep, done them all).  As an inveterate multitasker, I have certainly tried combining knitting and other activities.  TV plus knitting usually works; phone-clamped-between-ear-and-shoulder plus knitting works (although after a long conversation, yoga is more needed than ever); online bill-pay plus knitting saves no time, and markedly increases the likelihood of sending your mortgage payment to the phone company.    The problem is that knitting is repetitive motion, and no matter how much I try to relax my shoulders and wrists, they insist on kinking after a certain amount of time.  Yoga (I do a modified Bikram routine), unlike knitting, removes the kinks; sadly, all of the yoga poses I can think of specify what you are supposed to do with your hands--and it's not knitting.  On a particularly hectic day, I did try to combine the treadmill and knitting--why not?  I read and treadmill all the time.  Well,  I'll let the photo speak...that's Grandma's scarf there, next to my sneaker.  Hmm...maybe if I forgo the iPod....

  I just love being simultaneously wide-awake and exhausted at 4 a.m., simply because your body thinks it's still in Paris.  Oh well; if the husband insists that you accompany him on one of his business trips, then it's hard* to complain about being dragged to the City of Light (see why it got that name?).  Incidentally, this photo was taken from our hotel room balcony; the man does like to travel in style. So here I am in my pajamas, blogging, working away on the happy cat hat and trying not to wake the children.  No photos of the hat just now, sorry; it's supposed to be an Xmas gift for the teenaged stepdaughter, and she has been granted blog access (although I'm sure she has better things to do than snoop around in Stepmom's blog).  "Trying not to wake...?"  Yes, those rabies tags clink together quite musically, reminding me of...sleigh bells?!  I fully expect the small ones to come racing down the stairs at any moment, yelling "Santa's early!" *but clearly not impossible

Now that I have a few projects under my belt, it's time to knit something for myself.  It started as innocently as that.  And then I saw this Adrienne Vittadini ad in a magazine, and tracked down the pattern book at WEBS (www.yarn.com).  I found a gorgeous silk & cashmere yarn, horribly expensive, at the Black Sheep Knitting Co., in Needham, MA.  So far, so good, right? (By the way, if a certain sense of deja vu is setting in, you may have read about Grumperina's AV sweater nightmare at www.grumperina.com.  Read on, read on--just be warned that your sense of deja vu will only increase.) Anyway.  I did a swatch in stockinette stitch, and then I decided to start with a sleeve so I could see how the lace pattern looked.  It looked great!  So good, in fact, that I decided to block it and sew the seam so I could try it on.  This was back in, oh, January 2005, before I started obsessively photographing every stage of a project (before I had a blog, in other words), so I will have to rely on words alone:  the sleeve was long enough for an ape, and wide enough so that, instead of falling in a fluid line from shoulder to wrist, it wadded and wrinkled into something resembling an elephant's leg.  I conquered my disappointment by figuring I had learned an important lesson:  openwork stitches expand after blocking!!  Undaunted, I frogged and started over, this time decreasing the width of the sleeve by omitting a partial repeat on each side.  Didn't take too long to reach the sleeve cap, but by the time I arrived there, I had realized that since I had changed the lace stitch repeat on the sleeves, I would now have to change the lace stitch repeat on the body so that the cables and eyelets would miter nicely at the raglan seams (see photo above).  At the time this frankly seemed a little over my head, but I did some calculations and realized my raglan seams should work if I just centered the body lace on a cable instead of an eyelet panel. So I finished the sleeve and started on the body.  Here is a close-up of the end of the sleeve, and of the transition from stockinette stitch to lace on the front--which turned out to be my next problem.  My relief at seeing that the lace patterns would meet properly at the raglan seams was short-lived, as I held the front up to my body and realized that the lace started precisely at nipple level--not very flattering, not a look I'm comfortable with.  (Which is exactly how the sweater falls in the photo above--meaning the fact that I got so far before noticing this was entirely caused by my own carelessness.  HATE THAT.  Although in my own defense, the mannequin appears to have been constructed with only a faint suggestion of nipple--kind of misleading, really.)  With much profanity, I did more calculating, having realized that since the gauge of the lace and stockinette sections was different, moving the lace up my chest was not as simple as just working a few more rows of stockinette.  Not only that, but I realized I was dissatisfied with the casual, tending-to-roll stockinette hem--the sweater seemed a little too dressy for that--so with a deep breath I frogged, and started the front over, this time adding a turning row for a more finished hem.  I got all the way to the end of the front and then thought the neck just seemed too high, so I backed it down a bit, and then knit the back and second sleeve without incident.  Put it together, blocked it, and then--well, here it is.  Does it seem a little, um, sacklike to you?  BAGGY?  I don't look much like Ms. Mannequin in it, do I.  Only now did I realize that I had based the measurements on an UNBLOCKED swatch.  $#^^&%^**#!!!  In desperation, I actually wetted the thing (silk and cashmere, if you recall), and threw it in the DRYER.  Alas, that only made it short and wide, and closed up the lace pattern.  By the way, that slight fuzziness that is visible on the stockinette part started while I was knitting, and was NOT a result of the dryer--so if you don't like fuzzy sweaters, don't shell out $30 a skein for this yarn--or avoid stockinette stitch, as the lace sections look fine. I did wear it once, out to dinner, and the thing was so awfully warm that I felt lightheaded.  After a couple of glasses of wine I looked into the mirror behind the bar and watched the beads of sweat rolling down my bright red face.  I couldn't wait to leave.  I wonder how many others out there have their own AV sweater nightmare....

Teenaged Stepdaughter has pointed out that the rabillettes might be even more appropriate for the Kitty Hat designed by Kitty Schmidt (http://www.kittyville.com/knit.html), and featured in Stitch 'N Bitch immediately after the Sparkle Hat.  I have to agree.  As for as how to best utilize the rabillettes, that will take some experimentation.  On the swatch at left, I tried using only seasonally appropriate green bells, which I thought went nicely with Berroco's "Medley" yarn. I suppose I could have used Christmas red yarn, although my eyes hurt just thinking about it. Anyway, the r-ettes are spaced fairly close together in the bottom two rows, which I'm thinking would work best for a border, and farther apart in the top three rows.  They are quite large, 1 1/4" wide and 1 1/8" high, and could probably be spaced even farther apart with good effect, or even used as individual accents.  Some of them wanted to turn and show their backsides, so I let them, to give an accurate idea of how they will look on a project.  What an odd direction I've taken since my first project after returning to knitting, a year or so ago.  Here it is again, the Aran Coat by Dame DB (accessorized with TV remote--a forbidden toy unless Mom is trying to shoot a few photos).  That same bright blue merino yarn (brand? no idea) used to be part of the project that caused me to stow my knitting needles for over a decade: a sweater in the round that I inexplicably did not realize was big enough to fit a sumo wrestler until it was almost up to my armpits. Anyway, once I decided to try knitting again, I thought to begin with something for the smallest person I knew--my year-old son.  I liked this pattern in DB's Classic Knits for Kids, but it only included directions for one size, 4-6 years, and it called for aran weight yarn--too heavy.  I pulled Sumo out (ouch!  I remembered that blue as being a little less intense) and the yarn appeared to be light worsted weight.  Well, what if I followed the pattern, using worsted instead of aran?  It would probably turn out to be, oh, size 2 or 3; if it was still too big, he could grow into it....  So I frogged the thing and got to work (no, I didn't make a swatch).  As you can see, the finished article did turn out rather oversized; I estimate it will truly fit him well sometime next year.  The only part that really gave me trouble was the collar border.  With no schematic of the collar, and no photo of how it looked from the back, these directions confused me:  "Cont in patt until border fits along shaped edge of collar to centre...."  Huh?  So I took the pattern and partially finished collar into my friendly local yarn shop, Creative Warehouse in Needham, MA, where one of the employees looked at them and said, "Hmm.  I don't know.  I guess you'll have to just trust in the pattern."  "'Trust in the pattern?'"  "Yes, just keep going, it will make itself clear.  Trust in the pattern."  Okay, Yoda. Well, Yoda was right--and the directions seemed crystal clear, in hindsight.  Next, I knit a scarf, slavishly following the pattern (see "Chevron & Feather Scarf" in "Finished!").  After that, I started making changes to the patterns; small ones, at first, but then....  More in my next post. 

Sometimes even a vet needs to be creative, for instance when trying to figure out how to keep that Labrador from chewing off his bandage YET AGAIN, or how to splint the broken wing on the chickadee found by that adorable eight-year-old (who is now sitting expectantly--since you told her you were sure you'd think of something--in the waiting room).  But creativity is not necessarily an asset in many aspects of veterinary medicine.  I'll use SOAPing a patient as an example (note that while your groomer may shampoo, blowdry, brush, comb, clip or strip, clean ears, clip nails, and attend to the dreaded anal glands, SOAPing is only done by your vet!).  First, a little background.  Vets, like MDs, use the "SOAP" method to work up a patient:  Subjective (patient history as given by patient's owner--or by the patient if he or she can talk); Objective (the factual results of your physical exam plus any other tests and procedures); Assessment (possible diagnoses based on S & O); and finally Plan (what to do about all of the above).    When using this method any creative variations are frowned upon; for instance, you are not supposed to formulate a Plan before you have Objective facts.  In addition, you are supposed to follow the same procedure every time you perform a physical exam, so you don't forget anything.  Then you are supposed to use this handy mnemonic to make sure that when you reach Assessment, you don't forget any possible categories of rule outs....  Well, how about that!  I've forgotten it.  Darn.  I think I remember some of the categories:  Metabolic, Neoplasia, Infectious, Toxin, Autoimmune, Trauma; was it AT MINT?  TAN TIM? MAN TIT?  Oh well. But with knitting, there are so many opportunities for creativity, it's enough to make you want to...plead sensory overload and lie on your sofa, staring at the nice, blank ceiling.  No.  It's incredible, really.  Not only are there an infinite variety of stitch patterns, there are also endless options for materials (here's a few you may not have thought of:  http://www.vipfibers.com/index.php) and projects.  And that's not all.  Vogue Knitting lists 14 different casting on methods, 8 different increases, 13 decreases and 13 methods for binding off!  To illustrate the creativity gap between vetting and knitting, I dug out these colorful charmers.  Paillettes, right?  Wrong.  These are RABIES TAGS.  If you have a dog, one of these is* dangling from his or her collar right now.  Doesn't it seem a shame that they aren't put to other, more decorative uses?  I've always thought so, which is why I've saved hundreds of these things (and I am a big believer in Throwing Useless Stuff Away).  I'm thinking a Rabidly Sparkly Hat (see Sonya Laska's design on p. 163 in Stitch 'N Bitch); or maybe an Old Yeller scarf.  Someday soon I'll post a photo of a swatch with rabillettes attached (after I knit one, in other words.) *No?  Your pooch does not have one of these?  Shame on you.  Take him or her to your vet or to a rabies clinic and get one, pronto.

If you have never seen a muzzled cat, you are probably in the majority. Cats hate muzzles, so vets don't like to use a muzzle with a cat lover present.  (Vets love cats too, but they are not above protecting themselves when necessary).  As pictured, the muzzle is still upside-down, but I added this photo so that I can clearly show the importance of right-side-up vs. up-side-down.  Imagine that you have a three-eyed cat, aptly named Cerberus (three eyes--three heads; cat--dog; close enough), and then take a close look.  You will see that the little fellow's eyes are exposed.  Not only that, they're bugging out--clearly the poor thing is terrified.  Now, if you take a look at this photo, you will see that Cerbie's bobbles--I mean eyes-- are completely covered.  Yes!  The muzzle is applied correctly, which is good news for two reasons:  first, the little hole at the end of the muzzle is positioned so Cerbie can breathe, and second, the muzzle also acts as a blindfold.  Like birds that are quieted when their cage is covered, or horses that calm down when blindfolded, cats that can't see their surroundings immediately relax...okay, that last part is bullshit.  They just can't see their target anymore.  (Unless they're wrapped in a towel or zipped into a cat bag, they do still have claws, remember?)   Anyway.  It's always a good idea to make sure the patient is okay after it's been wearing a muzzle for awhile; the experience can be very stressful.  Quiet, please...  ...  ...  ....  Phew!  Heart still not beating. Okay, that poor sweater deserves a breather.  Here it is in all of its non-muzzled glory:  gorgeous, yes?  Just Debbie Bliss doing what she does best ("Aran Coat" from Classic Knits for Kids).  It's lovely from any angle (see "Finished!" for a mostly-unobstructed front view), but the back view really is the stunner.  The yarn is merino, very nice, although I have no idea what brand, as it sat, unlabeled, in my closet for about a decade.... 

First of all, "Secretary Spread" (SS) is not my term; grossly un-PC, it also seems hopelessly outdated.  I guess "executive assistant spread" just doesn't have that catchy alliteration.  If you've never heard of SS, it refers to the supposed spread (and concomitant increase in size and decrease in tone) of the posterior caused by long hours spent, well, sitting on it.  SS could just as easily be called "truck driver spread," or "telemarketer spread," or "clinically depressed spread", or "lazy piece of sh_t spread," or .... Anyway, I never worried about SS while I was a veterinarian, as the only time I spent sitting was when I was returning phone calls--usually while gobbling down my lunch.  Performing physical exams?  Standing.  Surgery?  Standing.  Taking x-rays?  Standing.  Placing a catheter, replacing a bandage, expressing anal glands (don't ask)?  Standing, standing, standing.  Or sometimes kneeling--but never sitting.  Now, if I'm not sitting at my computer, I'm sitting and knitting; not good for the rear view.  (Which reminds me:  knitting is not yoga, contrary to what the folks at Health & Nutrition may think--see http://www.healthnnutrition.co.in/display_Standard.asp?section=fitness&subsection=yoga&xml=October2002_yoga_standard1   More on this in a future post). Another difference between knitting and vetting:  if you are a knitter you have projects.  If you are a veterinarian you have patients.  Projects will not bite you.  (Stabbing yourself with your knitting needles doesn't count, nor does snagging a hangnail on your yarn.)  Hence, projects never need to wear muzzles.  Pictured:  the exception that proves the rule.  No, your cat probably didn't like wearing that muzzle, either.  (Click on photo for a larger view).  My gosh, I just realized I put the muzzle on upside-down!  Shame on me; I guess it really has been awhile....  Well, no time for another photo shoot right now; I'll have to post a pic of a correctly muzzled sweater later. Next post:  More differences; a happier photo of sweater (yes, the first one I'd knit in years), sans muzzle.

I don't mean "knitting and kvetching" (more commonly known as "stitching and bitching"); since leaving behind life as a practicing veterinarian, and then rediscovering knitting, I've simply had some time to think about the similarities and differences between a knitter and a veterinarian.  ("Differences?" you might ask.  "Aren't those pretty obvious?"  For the most part, yes....) I'll start with similarities:  first, the sheer tactile pleasure of handling an animal's fur is much like the soothing feel of a soft wool between your fingers (assuming the animal doesn't have a lot of scabs, or mange, or fleas, or ticks...).  Second:  in both knitting and vetting, you can't do a good job without the proper tools, and in both cases, these include...needles!  Third:  one of my favorite parts of being a vet was performing surgery, and seeing how beautifully a well-sewn incision can heal; isn't it also amazing how seams in knit garments can virtually disappear?  Fourth:  I used to have an entire wall of books devoted to veterinary medicine, and now--you guessed it--that same space is filled with knitting books and magazines, and stash.  Fifth:  being a veterinarian is like being a knitter in that, when you tell people what you do, they almost always react in one of two ways:  warmth and enthusiasm, or else an awkward silence (during which it becomes clear that your new acquaintance thinks you are insane).  And sixth:  both as a knitter and as a veterinarian, your, shall we say, professional curiosity is regularly piqued.  In the former case, it might be that friend's cat who is at the water bowl every time you visit (diabetes?  kidney failure?), or perhaps the nearly bald dog walking down the street (Cushing's disease? hypothyroidism?), while in the latter, it's the sweater on the person next in line at the grocery store (that is the most amazing cable pattern I've ever seen!), or the hand-knit sweater in the corner boutique (how did the designer get the hem to curve like that??). Next post:  some not-necessarily-obvious differences between knitting and vetting.  Plus, the first sweater I knit after picking up my long-idle knitting needles once again.